Fishy Romance
by FlowerofAdversity
Summary: Wasabi meets the love of his life at a villain convention and he creates the one machine the Kill Bot 9000 that could destroy them once and for all.


Fishy Romance

Synopsis: A CSC fan-fiction centering on Wasabi and his love life. Wasabi thought his romantic prospects were inexistent until he attends a villains' convention and discovers the love of his life, a mako shark aptly named Mako Sashimi.

Chapter 1--Moping

Dr. Wasabi was sitting in his oversized hover chair watching failed plots on his computer monitor. Every single time, he had been thwarted by upstart adolescents and he could do nothing but grumble in frustrations. Bubba, who respected the Doctor in the highest regard, couldn't bear to see his friend in a state of such deep melancholy.

"Wasabi, why the long face ? Life isn't so bad, now is it ? Keep your chin up, Doctor !", he said, trying to cheer him up a bit. Usually, Bubba's goofy faces and silly antics would make him laugh, but not this time. After all the years of being a demented villain, he still had nothing to show for it. Not even a second-in-command of the opposite sex to laugh manically with him. Such a living grew old, tawdry and honestly, boring. His heart felt completely hollow, and his life, though rich as it could be with all the things money could buy, was shallow.

"Ach, Bubba…You don't understand mine condition. It's awfully lonely for a piranha like myself in this malicious world. All I want to do is conquer it, but those blasted Chooks always foil me.", Wasabi sighed, lowering his face into his hands and beginning to weep. Bubba had never seen his pal so down in the dumps. He had happened to pick up a newspaper earlier and it had mentioned something about a 'Villains Convention' in the city.

"Wasabi, look at this !", Bubba said, proudly showing the gargantuan article to his carnivorous friend.

"Convention, ey ? This might just be the medicine the good doctor needs, ja ?", Wasabi stated, stroking his chin thoughtfully. He had a mischievous glint in his eye and a sly grin on his face.

"I take it that Wasabi is going then.", Bubba added, with a huge, goofy grin.

"You got it, you big ape. I'll spruce myself up and be heading out. _Don't _follow me, Bubba.", Wasabi said.

"Awww, but why not ?", Bubba said, a bit hurt.

"The ninja chimps can't be trusted in the lair while I'm gone. You know that !", Wasabi responded, a bit frustrated. It was true though. The chimps, though expert fighters, couldn't be held responsible for keeping the lair clean and tidy.

"Yes, Bubba know that well. Do not worry, Doctor Wasabi ! Bubba will do his best to keep ninja chimps in line !", Bubba said as Wasabi went into his master bedroom to make a quick change and thank Bubba for his hard-work ethic.

"Looking good, Boss !", Bubba shouted as Wasabi left the lair for his high-class VW and sped away out of the garage into the city. From the security cameras, Bubba could see Wasabi wave as a sort of 'thank you' for the compliment. The big albino gorilla couldn't help but feel a sense of pride being given the chance to take care of the lair once more, and as usual, he wouldn't fail his Boss.

Chapter 2--Those Eyes, That Jaw, Those Fins

The villain convention was bustling. All the major villains of Wasabi World had gathered to 'talk turkey' about how they would collaborate to put an end to the Chop Socky Chooks someday. Even if this plan never came to fruition, the plotting and the culmination of their work would be worth their blood, sweat, and tears.

After the demonstration made by the Hairy Sumo Brothers, the villains were left to mingle and enjoy the hours du'erves. Wasabi found a few items that he enjoyed. Being a self-proclaimed chocoholic, he indulged himself every so often when he wasn't busy fighting off the Chooks or plotting to destroy them. He was in seventh heaven having his fill of all the hours du'erves he could until he saw a sumptuous female mako shark. She too, adored hours du'erves but caught a glimpse of him. Had he not swallowed a delectable piece of sushi earlier, he swore at this moment, someone would've had to do the Heimlich Maneuver on him. Oddly, the shark knew who he was and came sauntering up to him, her sensuality turning many a male head in the room. However, she only had eyes on one piranha, and that was Wasabi.

"Name's Mako Sashimi. I am honored to be inhaling the same air as you are, Herr Doctor.", she said, bowing profusely and meeting her sapphire eyes with his green ones. His cold-blooded heart palpitated furiously within his chest as she grinned flirtatiously at him, batting her eyelashes. He had never met a woman this gorgeous, or fierce before, and he _liked_ her caliber of woman.

Mako and Wasabi talked and laughed the rest of that evening and she quietly slipped her his number on a business card.

"I do so hope we see more of each other.", she said, with a slightly seductive tone. The doctor too, hoped for the same. At the moment, he couldn't erase Mako's curvaceous form out of his mind and it was more than he had dreamed for. It seemed that his meeting with Mako was too good to be true and for the moment, he wondered if it was, like his ill-fated romance with Dead-Eye. He prayed that it wasn't so, but at least he had escaped the doldrums and monotony of the lair for a while.

Chapter 2--I Like My Steak…Rare

When Wasabi had arrived back to the lair, he saw everything was left in peak condition, as he expected. The chimps were playing board games, DDR and exercising before they noticed that the doctor had returned.

"How was the convention, Sir ?", one of them asked, politely.

"It went better than expected.", Wasabi stated, straightening his coat momentarily. Bubba noticed a small business card with a lipstick mark in Wasabi's lapel pocket.

"Did the Boss meet someone special there ?", he asked, curiously, bounding up and down on his heels.

"Actually…ja. He did. I am hoping to meet her again. In fact, we will be having dinner tomorrow. I am going out at 6:00 pm, promptly. I expect you to keep everything in ship-shape. If you do, I might feel compelled to reward you.", Wasabi said, looking at the calling card and kissing it himself. He held it up to his nostrils for a moment and took in the smell of _Elizabeth Arden's "Red Door"_. He looked a bit lightheaded and sighed rhapsodically.

"Looks like Boss is in love.", Bubba stated, nudging him in the side. Wasabi bumped the annoying ape's arm away.

"Not qvite yet, Bubba. I am givink this one some time. Who knows ? She could be even vorse than Dead-Eye vas.", Wasabi confessed with a bit of a shiver. The mere mention of Dead Eye made him shudder, scaring him to the core. He was glad she was far, _far_ away from him now, concocting her own evil schemes. Wherever she was, though, he was relieved she had no access to him, because his actions were always cloaked by his own genius technology. This way, no other villain could have the advantage on his incredible, yet deviously evil plans.

Wasabi and Mako met at her favorite restaurant, _La Rue._ It served the finest cuisine that anyone could get around Wasabi world, but only the very wealthy could dine here, or so Wasabi thought. Mako taught him that eating on a shoe-string could be done if you knew what to get. The steak, her ultimate treat, had been served red, swimming in blood.

"Don't you think cooking it would be healthier ?", Wasabi questioned.

"No. Sharks don't have to worry about poisons like everyone else. I could eat a fugu without it being prepared properly and still not be affected.", Mako said. Wasabi couldn't help but be strangely aroused by what she had said.

"Wunderbar…the indestructible uber-shark…", he thought, dreamily. She soon noticed he was looking at her, seeming to be star-struck.

"Am I boring you ? You look as if you are going to fall asleep.", Mako said, knowing better.

"Nein, liepshin.", Wasabi said. Very suavely, Wasabi leaned over the table to take Mako's fin and kiss it gently. She blushed hotly.

"And _what_ was that for ?", she said, quizzically.

"Just a sample of what is to come, liepshin.", Wasabi said, wriggling his eyebrows seductively.

"You are quite the character.", Mako said, with a toothy grin. The two continued their dining and later went to see the latest disaster film together.

"It seems we have more in common than I originally thought.", Mako said after discussing the film in great length with her new beau.

"I had that feeling from the moment I saw you.", Wasabi said.

"Now you're just flattering me, and flattery, little man, will get you nowhere.", Mako said as Wasabi led her to her lair.

"We'll see about that.", Wasabi said, trailing his fin under her chin. She looked as if she was about to melt in his arms. He leaned forward to kiss her passionately before departing for the night.

"Now think upon that my sweet Sashimi…and know I will be doing the same as I sleep tonight.", Wasabi said as his fin delicately left hers and the two said their silent good night for that evening. Both seemed to feel as if they were levitating as they departed. This was only the beginning of something more wonderful for the both of them, and the worlds they both knew would drastically and marvelously change.

Chapter 3--Wasabi's Wedding

In a matter of a couple years, Mako and Wasabi agreed to tie the proverbial knot. Matters had changed in Wasabi's lair quite a bit. Some of the transformations the chimps and Bubba liked, and others they did not. But, the guys had to admit that they enjoyed a feminine touch around the lair. Not only was Mako aesthetically pleasing to the eyes, but she was also fatally intelligent in every tiny detail. Of course, the architecture of the henchmen's lives were metamorphosing before their eyes, but they were glad that Wasabi finally had met the 'one fish of his dreams' he had been searching for. It seemed, yes, that even villains had happy ever afters in their lives, too.

Wasabi's wedding was attended by every well-known villain in Wasabi world. For one day the citizens of Wasabi World could rest easy that he wouldn't be doing any scheming until the honeymoon was over. Wasabi knew that all too well, and to be honest, he was feeling a little bit nervous like any sensible groom would. Thankfully Mako was different than the other women he had known and dated in the past. She would stick by him through anything, and at least she wasn't a psychotic mess like so many of his past girlfriends were.

There he stood, shaking like a leaf inwardly and outwardly, maintaining a sense of je ne sais quois outwardly as his friends and compatriots watched. Bubba stood by his side as his best man, grinning at his boss dumbly. Wasabi had to admit that he was glad he had friends like Bubba because his evil operation would've never succeeded by itself, and they were the ones that helped him maintain every last detail. Their duties would still be similar but of course, if little ones entered the equation, life would become even more complex. Many of them weren't ready to take the step to becoming baby-sitters, but knowing Wasabi's desire to be a father, they really had no choice in the matter. It would be a crash-course in learning for them.

Ave Maria began to play over the organ pipes and Mako began her procession down the aisle. As she sauntered to and fro, many of the males in the congregation had trouble keeping their mouths closed. Even Wasabi, who had seen her in many different dresses, thought the wedding dress was by far, the most sumptuous outfit he had ever seen her wear. As she glided down to meet him, she daintily held out her fin and toothily grinned at him, from ear to ear. Her dark eyes sparkled in the light, and her skin seemed to have a glow about it. He was used to seeing this glow when she was with him and likewise when he basked in her radiance.

The vicar had the two repeat their wedding vows, exchange rings and finally, take their first kiss together as husband and wife. Instead of Wasabi dipping Mako down into his arms, she did just that to him and nearly left him breathless.

"I almost had to come up for air just zen !", Wasabi replied with a wowed chuckle. She brought him back up to her side and held him close. With a tender whisper, she said,

"I love you so much, Doctor. You've made me the happiest fish in Wasabi world."

"And you too, mein liepshin. Happier than you vil evah know.", Wasabi said as he was unexpectedly picked up in her fins and she rushed him down the aisle, chortling the whole way out as they were met by kaleidoscopic bubbles rained upon them and picked up by their limousine.

Chapter 4--Thwarted Again

It wasn't long after the honeymoon had come to a close that Wasabi got wind that he had become a father. It had happened so quickly he hadn't even had time to blink. He had had plenty of time to prepare the lair for little ones, he just wasn't thinking that they would come into his life so quickly. With little ones in the picture, stopping the Chop Socky Chooks would be next to impossible. But Wasabi was filled with inspiration. While he and Mako plotted the Chooks' demise, their little ones would be taken care of by a maid that Mako knew. Bubba and the chimps would follow their leader wherever he went.

Wasabi felt his plan for taking care of his seven little children was genius. Each child would be paid special attention to as well as given proper villain education from the finest tutors so they could succeed their father in his desires. He had no idea how challenging each child would be. Of course, he loved them, but they were all incredibly gifted little piranhas. Tragically, it limited his time fighting against the Chooks and returning home to the Lair. Mako would be left to fight on her own and she would usually have her tailfin handed to her. After that, she was comforted by her husband.

But the two were becoming tired of being thwarted time after time after time. Sighing, and taking care of their duties for the day, the two fed, bathed and put their seven children to sleep, thinking upon new methods of destroying their adversaries.

Mako had a flash of insight that night. They would build a robot that could easily defeat the Chooks, giving them super-villain status. With their Kill-Bot 9000, they would be the only villains in Wasabi World that would successfully chop the Chooks into bits. As soon as their nemeses were minced into tiny little pieces, the two of them could begin the work that Wasabi had planned all along. The two knew that they couldn't be overconfident however. They needed to begin building the Kill-Bot 9000. With the help of their ever-vigilant and obedient chimps, they would have their machine of ultimate destruction up and running in no time.

Chapter 5--No One Told Me About The Self-Destruct Button

After testing the Kill-Bot for the umpteenth time, Wasabi and Mako were ready to initiate their trap for the Chooks. They had dummies that resembled friends of their's along with realistic voice recordings that played on a loop. The Chooks wouldn't notice because the dummies were wax figures and meticulously detailed. Again, the seven children, Hans, Frieda, Jan, Greta, Eric, Trisha and Andre all stayed home under the cautious, loving care of Mako's maid, Lola. Before they left, they kissed them all goodbye.

"You seven be good little villains and villainesses while mommy and daddy are out beating the stuffing out of the Chooks, alright ?", Mako reminded. The babies, that were having fun with Lola, smiled and nodded and went back to playing and enjoying themselves.

While Mako and Wasabi waited and watched from a safe distance, the Chooks made their entrance and tried saving the dummies. Mako laughed as she pushed the switch to launch Kill-Bot 9000.

"This has to be some sort of joke. Well allow me to provide the punch line.", Joe said as he came toward the metallic monster with a masculine fist. He nearly broke his knuckles against the steel of the robot. The others tried taking it down but saw that physical attacks wouldn't work.

"I have an idea. How about a taste of my Kung Bao ?", Chuckie said as he charged up a sphere of chi and shot it at the gargantuan machine. It hit the Kill-Bot 9000 in the chest, but merely tickled it.

"That's no good, Chuckie ! Let me try my koto…", Sparrow said, playing the melancholy notes on the instrument. The koto wasn't the only thing she could play. She could also play the haunting bamboo flute just like her father, Mu Gu Gai Pan. The music caused the robot to stop momentarily and contemplate the melody.

"Go, CP !", Chuckie said as he gathered himself to his feet.

"Hey, there's a button here. I wonder what'll happen if I press it !", Chick Pea said as she pushed the glowing red button.

"Oh, crap.", the Killbot stated, morbidly as it began to shake, shiver and at last, explode.

"No one _told _me there was a self-destruct button !", Wasabi ranted as an arm fell in front of him and his wife. He simply stayed there, shocked at what had just come to pass. Mako simply rolled her eyes.

"Do I have to do everything myself ?", she huffed, scrambling to her feet to fight the Chooks herself.

"Look out !", CP called to Sparrow as Mako rushed up behind her. Rapidly, the young bird easily flipped the shark onto her back. Even though Mako was trying to bite her to pieces, Sparrow wasn't afraid.

"Best give up now while you still have teeth in your head.", Sparrow threatened and Mako angrily got up to her feet and charged into Sparrow. The other Chooks defended her and finally knocked her out, before she had the chance to call Bubba and the chimps to back her up. Seeing it as a prime time to exit while the getting was good, the Chooks too their leave and cleaned up the trash the mad scientist and disappeared from the scene.

Epilogue

Defeated, though they were, Wasabi and Mako picked themselves up, dusted themselves off and went back to the Lair with Bubba and the chimps. They were saddened that they hadn't been able to defeat the Chooks this time. The Killbot-9000 had been trashed and Wasabi vowed never to use a robot to do his dirty work. He would think of other methods in the future, but for now, just hearing the sound of his children's laughter as they thrilled to Wasabi's bedtime stories. After he and Mako kissed them all and tucked them in, they had to admit, being parents wasn't so bad and at least it took the edge off of a bad day. In that small tradition, they knew that even losing against the heroes wasn't so rotten after all.

The End


End file.
